AHWISHAHWUZZINWISHAW

AHWISHAHWUZZINWISHAW So there I was in Clancy's Bar on Dundee Street, Fountainbridge in the holy city of Mbra when this homesick drunk comes up and starts slurring how much he missed Wishaw. Of course, we all carry our own Wishaws in our hearts, the wee hometown with roses round every door, a thousand miles from Strumpet City, but by an amazing coincidence this guy’s Wishaw was in fact the actual Wishaw itself, all the way from Lanarkshire. You couldn’t make it up, could you? MD

Ah wish ah wuz in Wishaw
Far away fae Fountainbridge
These Embra folk fair mak yer boak
Wi their bluidy He'rts and Hibs
Ahm gaun back tae Wishaw
Whaur the barmen ken ma name
Whaur men are men in that urban glen
Ahm sae proud tae call ma hame.

Ahm sick o Embra's nightlife
The bluidy disco scene
Buster Brown's really gets yer down
Annabelle's is one bad dream
And the women paw yer body
Aye, they only want one thing
Ah canny stand their groping hands:
It's enough tae mak yer sing

Ahwishahwuzzinwishaw...

Ahm sick o Embra daytime
A' they crowds in Prince's Street
And they tourist girls that cross the world
Just tae stand on your puir feet
And they smile in foreign accents
And their eyes begin tae gleam
And ah gotty run afore they pinch ma bum
It's enough tae mak yer scream

Ahwishahwuzzinwishaw...

Ah think ah want ma mammy
Help ma boab ahm gauny greet
Why am ah here drinking warm flat beer
In this dive in Dundee Street?
And the barmaid's leering at me
Aye, she winks and she moves ma way
Oh, stop it please, ahm on ma knees
Cos it's enough tae mak yer pray

Ahwishahwuzzinwishaw...